Time to take a break and reflect on a couple of things going on in my life.
For one thing, I'm taking a break playing poker...More on the NL side of things, I'd just rather play NL up in AC than down here in MD...It's time to stack bread again and play when it aint so much on my mind bothering me.
I need to get a spot to run my games again and when I do, half of my worries will be out of the way.
Gotta get my car back from the shop, Thats probably whats been bugging me the most and it really caused a major inconvenience to me right now....I pretty much don't do shit cause I don't have a way to get anywhere, I think I would have a spot by now if I had my car, but being car-less I just can't do shit. I haven't even been to the barber shop.
Talking with some friends over breakfast, the conversation we had really stuck in my head and its about time that I went a tried to find a job. As much as my Mom has hammered it into my head, I refused to listen...but seeing it in a different perspective, It might be just the thing I need to do anyway. Shit, I had to overcome some road blocks just cause I don't have a legit source of income. Shit, why not make some more money right? It will definately make life alot easier to become a "normal" person. I know the transition is going to be hard, But it might be best for me. I fucking hate office jobs, and even more manual labor but lets see where this road will lead too...Its all about my daughter...I get things done when it comes to her, but its obviously not in a responsible way...I'm not as responsible as I thought I was...I mean, she has alot more than the average kid....some come to say she is very spoiled cause of me. She sees that I don't need to work to get whatever she needs and I don't want her learning bad habbits through me and that might be the most irresponsible thing I can do...show her its ok to be lazy and gamble to make ends meet...thats NOT what she needs to be learning at such young age...
I came to the conclusion I want to sell my condo...or even thinking about renting it out and finding a nice place to live and continue to run my game...Its time I mapped things out and write up a new route to take...Living this life is fun, but its very very stressful at times. Trust me, if I didn't have a daughter to raise, I wouldn't change shit about th way im living right now. Maybe this might work when she is 18 and is able to take care of her self and I can move away to where this would be more accepted as a way of life than here in MD...I could actually get a gig at a casino and play at other casinos, but till then, it might just be the right choice to get a decent job, run a game, play to help supplement the income from the "real" job.
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2 comments:
Whats up E this is Bowtie B (meukowboggus) from the board, man I see you still holding strong in the Poker thing. Man, I know you are going back and forth with that decision, man being a Consultant, its hard to go back into that 9 - 5 world. Man, I will just say this, figure out what you think is best for you and no matter what I respect you for putting your seed first, we need more folks who do that.
whats up man...Thanks man for the words of encouragement.
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